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I Don’t Believe In Soul Mates by Kimberlee of I have a degree in this!

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Hi, I’m Kimberlee. I connected with Franca during one of the Paper Doll Projects. I’m so grateful to have found her blog. We love chatting on Twitter about ‘Dr. Who’ and ‘Game of Thrones.’ My blog, I Have A Degree In This!, can sort of be described as a feminist fashionista blog. I studied fashion in college and wanted to share my opinions. What better way to do so than through a blog? I was happy to guest post for Franca during her honeymoon break. However, it was difficult for me to come up with a topic idea because my ideas about marriage are pretty liberal. She liked this post idea so here we go!

Little girls everywhere are raised under the notion that Prince Charming, Mr. Right a.k.a. our one true love is out there waiting for us. There are over 6 billion people on this planet. It is a ridiculous assumption that only ONE of those people are going to be a great partner for you. It really stacks the odds against you and leads to tireless dating. I think we need to end this idea and let people know that there is probably more than one person out there for you and that’s okay.

People have deep complex emotional layers and more than one person could make us happy. This is why we surround ourselves with multiple friends. We have the funny one who makes us laugh or the friend who has great horror stories about her online dating. The person you chose to spend the rest of your life with could be our opposite who keeps our lives interesting. The shy person dating the outgoing person who takes them out every night. Or the good girl who dates the rebel. Or they could have a similar personality where you two have everything in common and you easily get along. Sometimes you meet someone truly wonderful but the timing in your life isn’t right. The matches are endless.

I knew that the idea of one “soul mate” was preposterous and then I met my best friend (who didn’t want me to mention his name) who helped debunk this myth. My best friend is someone I consider one of those rare people you connect with (or a soul mate). Every one says we should date and we did try to for a few months but quickly realized our friendship was more important to us. He is one of those rare good guys left on this planet. We have that bond where we don’t have to say anything but know exactly what the other person is thinking. We talk everyday and tell each other everything. We wouldn’t work as a couple though. Besides the fact that he is Jewish and I’m not there are also differing long-term goals. He wants to marry a Jewish woman, raise kids out in the rolling hills of New Jersey. I, on the other hand, want to live in New York City for the rest of my days and I’m not very interested in kids or marriage. However, I still think of him as a soul mate and he’ll remain an important man in my life. This doesn’t discourage me from thinking I’ll never find another man who will make me happy.

I’m excited for the opportunity to meet another person who will add more meaning to my life. He’ll just have to be okay with my friend being a major part of my life. There’s room for two, right?

What about you do you believe in soul mates?

Comments on this entry are closed.

  • Kimberlee VDW 23 September 2011, 3:17 pm

    Aw yey it's finally up 🙂 Can't wait to see pics of your wedding!

  • oranges_and_apples 23 September 2011, 3:20 pm

    Coming Tuesday!

  • Ceri 24 September 2011, 6:25 am

    A really interesting post. I have been with my husband since I was 18 so had never really considered there might or could be anyone else but I guess part of the relationship is that you grow together.

    Can't wait to see the wedding photos!

  • Stef 26 September 2011, 7:51 pm

    Brilliant post. I couldn't agree more 🙂